Amelia was born on Flag day. She was born 8 months after we had lost Stephane. I remember the ride to meet her, and the anticipation of seeing my Great Niece for the first time. Her arrival was a ray of sunshine on what had become a very dreary world. Mark and I both cried when we held her.
Six months later her left eye began shaking and we all knew that was not a good thing. At first we thought she had been shaken or dropped. A detached retina, perhaps? A trip to her pediatrician and an MRI proved otherwise. She had an optic nerve glioma and we were advised to take her to Syracuse. My heart sank. I would rather that it had been an abuse issue than this. That is the truth.
I cannot even explain how I felt when I got home that afternoon. I sat for hours, just sitting nothing else. In shock I guess. I was sad, disappointed and scared.Most of all I was just plain angry.How could a good and loving God do this? How could the God that I believed in let something like this happen to us? Was it not enough that we had lost Steph? Now this! She was a baby. A baby that was so special and loved by so many. Why??
Well the good news was that Mimi’s tumor was not life threatening or malignant. The bad news was that it would be treated with low dose chemotherapy. Chemotherapy that would be administered every Friday for 13 months. Shortly before her second birthday she was in remission. It lasted 2 years and then she had another year of chemo. At the age of 5 she was in remission again.
We learned to live life in increments. MRI to MRI. Every 3 months, then every 6 months and the last time we got to go a whole year.
Through all of these years I have come to terms with God’s plan. I do not understand it but I know I have to trust in Him and have faith.
I have watched Mimi over the years and how people react to her kind heart and her awesome personality. One you meet her, you love her. We call it Mimified. She has touched many hearts.
Mimi and I have had many conversations about God. She was mad at Him too. I told her “Mimi God has a plan for your life. I do not know why you have this stupid tumor, but God is going to use you an a special way.” She said” is that the truth grandma?.” I told her yes. She hugged me.
I have been so blessed to have Mimi in my life. She has changed my life , for the better, in so many ways. She has taught me patience, she has shown me love and she tells me I am the best Grandma in the whole world. He is already using her.
Mimi’s last MRI showed the tumor is changing again. Yesterday she began another year of chemotherapy. This time it is oral, she takes a pill every day. We are praying for excellent results.
Yesterday we were taking her home and she was talking a mile a minute. She was stressed about starting treatment. She asked me” Grandma, if Bethany is your niece, and Bethany is my Mother, than what does that make you to me?” I said” well that makes me your Great Aunt.” She got quiet for a minute and then said” I am just going to call you Grandma!”
I love her.
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.